Mis for Managing Director:
Crafty, elusive
Kowtows to clients; but to juniors abusive
Sleek and well-groomed, he
Swans about like a diva
Steal clients or credit?
He attacks with a cleaver
Pompous, self-loathing
His wife and kids hate him
Knows everything and everyone:
You can't educate him* * Vis for Vice President:
Long-suffering, put-on
Screwed by MDs and clients, otherwise no-one
Chubby, disheveled, he
Rues weekends spent downtown
And longs for the day he
Can call in from the Hamptons
Bossy, intrusive
Associates hate him
Lusts for the VP in Bond Sales
But she just won't date him* * Ais for Associate:
Feckless and eager
Thinks he's Felix Rohatyn but his skills are too meager
Hair-slicked, suspendered, he
Wanders the 3:00 am hallway
Boasting how little he's slept
Since a week ago Tuesday
Loud-mouthed, annoying
Hot young models despise him
No matter how many bottles
With which he plies them* * Fis for Financial Analyst:
Bitter, exhausted
Never fucks, sleeps, or earns as much as his boss did
Tousled, unshaven, he
hunches over a keyboard
While vacations and nights out
Flash past like waves on a seashore
Rueful, uncertain
He ponders his Faustian bargain:
"For two years of this shit
I skipped screwing my girlfriend?"
With apologies to Guillaume Apollinaire. And everyone else, for that matter.
© 2010 The Epicurean Dealmaker. All rights reserved.